We've all seen our sad share of bad behavior in China, or by Chinese abroad. Most of this rudeness can be summed-up by the Chinese educational system that points finger at everybody else without taking responsibility for their own actions, not defining the problem and not teaching how to correct it. 

For the most part, Chinese can be polite and friendly. The problem stems from people not being properly educated and coming into money and prosperity too fast.

It's like giving a child a key to a Lamborghini and without any driving knowledge or measure of responsibility and telling him or her to drive it around the block. The child will destroy the car without a care in the world.

Don't get me wrong, I don't stereotype every Chinese as being rude. Chinese have many positive virtues, but some of these have been lost in the wave of materialism.

The problem gets worse when you allow foreigners in China to do what they wouldn't do back home. My situation was when a former colleague was drunk and too intoxicated to fly and he was still allowed to board the plane with his unruly behavior. 

There was a child on the grounds of the Zheng He Treasure Ship Park in Nanjing, who was hitting his mother. Wow, when that boy grows up he will not respect women at all!  Nobody said anything, until I thundered at him to stop and respect his momma. This is not my job and it's not my country.

Then there was the boyfriend beating his girlfriend on campus and all gathered around to watch, and nobody intervened. Until I came and broke it up.

Yes, people gather around curiously to rubber neck, but few do something to stop the alternation or help during an accident. 

Years ago, there was a "hit-and-run" incident near the school where I teach. The crowd just gathered to watch instead of helping the poor man off the road.

I was with another foreigner and we carried the poor guy to the side of the road and waved at the first person to call an ambulance.

Like one Chinese colleague once told me, "That's your responsibility to teach ethics!"

And I answered rather curtly, "No, it's not! This is your country!"

The lack of civility has been seen in Chinese tourists washing their feet in the fountain at the Louvre Museum in Paris or the Chinese teenager carving his name on the 3,500 year old relic at the Luxor Temple in Egypt.

When I talk about these problems, many Chinese say, "Oh, I feel ashamed! I'm so embarrassed!"

Stop saying this or that and do something by politely stating to the person what they are doing is wrong. Be an example to others. If others don't hold the door and behave gentlemanly or lady like, screw them!  Instead, say something. Worry about yourself and be the positive person you want to see in your country. But leave your rudeness at home. We don't want it in China, or overseas for that matter.

Daniel Otero, a freelancer and foreign teacher based in Nanjing, Zhejiang Province